7 Ways To React To Your Partner’s Hurtful Comments

Written by Abby Hill
3 mins, 20 secs Read
Updated On July 5, 2023

All relationships go through a rocky path at least once. In such situations, a lot of hurtful comments are passed which can permanently damage the relationship. Most people don’t know how to react to these as forgiving seems difficult. However, it is important to address these comments to build  a healthy relationship before you go on searching “how to check private browsing history on android

If you don’t know how to, don’t worry! We have got you covered. Below are 7 ways you can react to a partner’s hurtful comments. 

Wait for the situation to cool

When someone says something hurtful to you in an argument, your first instinct might be to give it back to them. However, you should hold off your response as there is a possibility to make the argument even more heated.

Thus, it is recommended that you wait for the situation to cool down and hold off your responses. This will allow you to assess the comments in a better manner and you won’t be reciprocating the same hurtful comments.

Identify what hurt you 

Take a moment to identify what hurt you. A lot of time people feel hurt by words that are said in an argument despite them being completely harmless. It can be because of the overall nature of the argument. Therefore, you should recognize what words in specific you found hurtful.

Also, you should try to think of the intent behind your spouse’s words as it will help you get better clarity. Another thing you can do is ask yourself why the words have the effect they have on you. You should try assessing them from both perspectives.

Look for the reason behind the argument

Another thing that you can do is look for the reason behind the argument. A lot of times, due to their own personal problems, people tend to take out their frustration on others. While that in no way justifies their words and actions, it can help you understand their side a bit more.

Therefore, you should consider going beyond the surface of the argument and try to figure out if there is something, in particular, causing it. For instance, if your spouse says hurtful things to you while drunk, it may be because he is intoxicated and not aware of his words.

Do not bring other people in

While you may think getting another person’s perspective on your problem is a good thing, it may not be. It is recommended that you only consider a third person’s opinion after your spouse consents to it as well. Moreover, adding another person to the equation can further complicate the problems.

Another thing to keep in mind is to not in any case include your children, if you have any. This can lead to a negative impact on your children and they may feel scared if they are too young to understand what is going on. Moreover, you should never ask your children to pick a side, if that ever happens. 

Don’t shut out your feelings 

A mistake that a lot of people make while addressing hurtful words is trying to move on without addressing your feelings. It is important that you address your feelings and not invalidate them. Suppressing what you feel will only pile up your emotions which can lead to an outburst later.

Therefore, you should validate your emotions and talk to them about your spouse when the situation has calmed down. Moreover, talking about what you feel will only help you move on from the problem in a much healthier manner.

Constructively channelize your anger

As mentioned before, if you let your anger get the best of you in regards to the comments, the situation can get a lot worse. Therefore, you should channelize your anger in a healthy manner. The first step of doing this is figuring out what you are feeling as it will allow you to get connected to your emotional self.

Once you are aware of your own feelings, you should try to channelize your anger via some physical activity or mental exercises. You can try breathing exercises and yoga to release your negative thoughts and anger.

Try to forgive and forget 

While both forgiving and forgetting is difficult, you should definitely give it a try. The first step to doing so is talking to your spouse about the problem. Address your problems with them in a calm manner, so both of you can understand each other’s perspectives. 

Once you are aware of what the problem is and why it is arising, you can go ahead to find a  solution. This may also lead to you espouse apologizing for their words and promising a change. As a result, it will make the forgiving and forgetting process a lot easier. That was all! Now you know the 7 ways you can react to your spouse’s hurtful comments.

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Author: Abby Hill